Earnest Emily

I need help. I feel like I waste too much time with nonsense. I am far from over the top on my social media addiction, but boy, do I feel hooked at times. I often feel a low-level bleh feeling about my time spent mindlessly scanning through Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, or Amazon. It’s a habit and I don’t like it. Maybe like most folks, I have a hard time balancing healthy issues (i.e. a bit of chocolate here and there, or checking in on Facebook to see what’s going on with my friends) with sometimes wasting what could be considered precious time in the day. I know I sound like I spend hours a day on social media and in reality I’m not even close to that, but my guilt-tripping brain makes me feel like I am. Just that minute here and there during the day or the time warps that suck me in when I have more open time at home.The bottom line: I feel like I waste time that makes me feel yuck and I want to do something about it.

The big question that popped into my brain just a few days ago was, “Is it imperative?” Is it imperative that I sign in to Facebook right now? Do I really need to skim pictures on Instagram? Is it absolutely necessary right now that I look for a new watchband to repair my 1992 Swatch watch (That was yesterday’s time fart. Did I just make that up? Time fart?)? I’ve spent a great deal of time debating over whether I just cancel my social media accounts altogether. It’s very tempting and I think overall I would really like it because I have a far-fetched dream that I would then live like Anne of Green Gables and spend lots of time frolicking in the yard amongst the rosebushes, but I digress. What about everything I would miss? My cousins from all over the country, high school friends, prayer requests, former students graduating…I also think there are many avenues of sharing love, compassion, and the hope of Christ via social media. Plus, there are funny cat videos.

My biggest guilt waves come at me when I’m trying to “multi-task” whilst with my kids. I want to kick myself when I’m looking on Pinterest (that I can rationalize in a heartbeat because it’s re: school lesson plans, dinner, etc.) or my neighbor’s dog pics on FB when I could be looking at my stinking kids! Have you seen my kids? They’re great! and funny! and as every human being that’s ever had a child tells me, this time goes by in a flash! What a cliché, but so very true. I want to squeeze them and not let them get any bigger (well, maybe just big enough for my littlest one to get out of diapers…)

Now I know I need to be realistic here and recognize that there are numerous times I can and need to (without guilt!) multi-task and have my face in front of the screen. But, I can be more aware and try to cut back on the wasteful time. I go back to my main question, “Is it imperative?” Sometimes, yes, and other times I can wait until after my kids are asleep to get a fix of social media, or even more likely, I don’t need to be on the computer in the first place. My book pile is there waiting for me. My husband is full of funny-ish jokes. Lots of living to be had and I’m bound and determined to live it more actively.